The general idea for this is to learn and refine skills in changing behavioral, emotional, and thinking patterns associated with problems in living, that is, those causing misery and distress.
We have states of mind:
1. Reasonable Mind - Operating out of a logical mind
2. Emotional Mind - Operating out of emotion
3. Wise Mind - Using both reasonable and emotional minds to come to a decision.
There are many words to describe the first two, both good and bad. But the wise mind is where we are thinking clearly and we are in touch with our emotions. This is where we make wise decisions.
There are skills that we will learn that will help us use our Wise mind instead of one of the other two. The first two, called "What" skills, that we learned tonight was:
1. Observe - just notice or pay attention or become aware without words. Stick to the facts, avoid interpretations or assumptions.
We can observe inside ourselves and outside ourselves. Inside is physical sensations, thoughts, feelings or emotions. Outside we can observe other people and the environment. You can not read anyone's mind so you do not know what they are thinking or feeling.
Take a moment and try to observe WITHOUT using words.
It's hard isn't it? I think it is.
2. Describe - Put into words what you observed but stick to the facts. Do not use judgmental words, like pretty, ugly, dumb, or smart. Or any other words that make a judgment on something or someone.
Now of course there was a lot more into this than just what I wrote. I just wanted to give a quick overview of what was talked about. (I did take notes :)
We also have to keep a weekly diary log sheet. It helps us to remember our skills and to practice them.
So why do this you ask?
Because I have been stuck in a rut for the better part of 48 years and I'm tired of thinking the same shit over and over again. Something has to give. The way I have been living isn't working for me anymore. So I have to do something to be able to live with myself, without all the, anxiety, anger, doubt, lack of self worth and etc. I want to be comfortable in my own skin. I think this will help me. I hope it does. I'm going to try my best to do this. I'm not doing this for any one person, but I am doing it for me.