11 September 2011

Memories of 10 years ago

11 Sept. 2001
Approx. 08:45

I wake up and get out of bed. I go turn the computer on to let it boot up while I did the normal morning stuff. Bathroom, something to drink. I come back to the computer and connect to the Internet. Upon entering my usual chatroom I am told by some of our friends in the UK to turn on our TV. (This is about 08:55) A plane had hit the World Trade Center. I grab the remote and turn it on. We talk about what an awful accident it is. Little did we know in just a few short minutes we would witness the plane hit the second tower.

We watch in horror as the second plane hits. I knew then for sure this was no accident. We continue to watch in silence to the reports on TV. I was completely stunned as I watched. I remember thinking of my great-grandmother who had just passed away in May. She would have been horrified had she lived to see. She remembered Pearl Harbor all too well.

We learn that a third plane has struck, but this time in DC at the Pentagon. At this point I wonder, just how many planes will these assholes use today. I also think about how many planes I know are in the air and it could be a lot. It is a very frightening thought.

I have been awake a little over an hour as I watch the South Tower collapse. The first words from my mouth are said in a hushed voice, “Oh my God. All the Firefighters are still in there.” I know they were. You see I am a Volunteer Firefighter in my home town at the time. I would have been in there too. So I know that FDNY guys are in there and I just watched them die. I may not know them personally but they are brothers to me. It was about this time I said the next tower could go as well. I hope they are telling the firefighters to leave but I know they might not. There are more people to save and a fire to fight.

We learn that a fourth plane has crashed in Pennsylvania. You can't help but wonder how many more. The news was also telling us the government was telling all planes to land. It is a scary thought.

The North Tower collapses. Again I know that the FDNY and other emergency responders are in there. (No disrespect to the other people who worked there and didn't make it out. But as a former Volunteer Firefighter I can't help but think of them.)

We learn they are evacuating people from Lower Manhattan. I know of someone who works there and wonders if she is ok. I do not know exactly where her office is. I pray she is ok.

12:16 We learn that all commercial and private planes are now out of the sky.

We continue to watch the coverage all day long. It was a sad day for me and everyone in the US. At one point I walk outside to just get some fresh air and the day is amazing. Sunny and green. I looked up and saw no contrails from planes and the world seemed amazingly quiet. Like even it knew, it was a sad day.

None of us as been the same since. Our world as we know it will never be the same. Our innocence lost on that September day. I catch myself watching others more closely, especially in airports and other large groups. It is as if I am afraid that something else will happen. I don't want other people to attack us and I don't want to attack them.

I just want to live in peace.

I don't know if it will ever happen, even our own country is divided. It is very sad. We are on the road to destroy ourselves quicker then anyone outside can. Every single one of us needs to remember.

United we Stand, Divided we Fall.